Self-Esteem and Living Consciously

Living consciously is the most crucial pillar to developing solid self-esteem. Living consciously is about being awake. It is about making more thoughtful and considered decisions. It is also about being less influenced by our habits and subconscious. It is about going through life thinking more carefully about ourselves, our patterns of behaviour, what affects us etc. and consciously making different choices. Living consciously is about taking responsibility for our life and how we choose to live and interact with the world.

Our brain likes to keep us in our comfort zone. Once we have developed a certain kind of behaviour this becomes a habit. We behave automatically without even thinking of our reactions. Over time we may find that certain habits no longer serve us. When we become “awake” to this realisation we are in a position to change our behaviour. We begin to live more consciously and this automatically will lead to an increase in self-esteem.

When we live consciously we do the following:

We stop living on autopilot. We begin to look at our emotions, thoughts, actions, decisions and behaviour more “critically”. We begin to observe ourselves more and think about what we experience and how we behave.

We open ourselves more to feedback from other people. Receiving input from others allows us the opportunity to become aware of “blindspots”, those aspects of ourselves that we prefer to ignore or perhaps even deny we possess. Feedback gives us the chance to think more about ourselves. It is a chance to work out if what the other person says is true or whether it is based on their perception or their own baggage.

We shift out of our comfort zone of always responding in a certain way. We begin to “question” what we say or do. We consider the impact on ourselves and others. We become willing to take an honest look at ourselves. Are we living and acting in a way that accurately reflects the real person deep inside of us?

So how can you increase the extent to which you live consciously and increase your self-esteem?

A managing director mentioned that he debriefs himself after every important meeting. He asks himself the following: How did I handle the meeting? How did I respond to the other attendees? Did I manage to bring out the best in them? What could I have done differently? What did I do wrong?

At the end of each day we can make time to reflect on: How did we feet about the day? What affected our reactions?

Do a mini assessment of yourself: Identify your strengths and shadow side. What traits or behaviours do you display that other people compliment you about? What are those aspects of yourself of which you feel less proud?

Learn to think for yourself. We are inundated with so many daily messages about what success is, acquiring the latest technology, etc. Begin to think more critically if whether what you see and hear is actually true? How many of these tangibles really are important to living a meaningful and fulfilling life? Make decisions that will increase your level of self-esteem.

Find ways to explore yourself. Some individuals are very happy to journal about themselves. Others prefer to see a coach or psychologist to learn more about them and what drives them. Contact me if you are keen to learn more about living a conscious life.

Develop a playful attitude of looking more analytically at who you are. See yourself as a Work In Progress, someone who is actively growing and learning more about themselves.

Here are some questions to explore. Write down several answers to each of the questions. Answer quickly.

If you choose to be more conscious at work, what would you do differently?

If you choose to be more conscious in your important relationships, what would you do?

If you choose to be more conscious about how you react in certain situations, what would you do?

If you thought about your insecurities and fears more consciously what would you notice?

If you wanted to feel more powerful and effective in certain areas where your consciousness is low, what would you be willing to experiment with?

Living consciously has a direct impact on your level of self-esteem.

Posted in Leadership, Self mastery.